{"id":14951,"date":"2017-01-09T01:00:11","date_gmt":"2017-01-09T05:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/?p=14951"},"modified":"2020-11-30T08:27:42","modified_gmt":"2020-11-30T12:27:42","slug":"vital-statistics","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics\/","title":{"rendered":"Vital statistics"},"content":{"rendered":"<h2>Add color and credibility to your copy with numbers<\/h2>\n<p>Which personal finance story would draw you in? One that starts:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\">Are you saving enough for retirement, no matter how young you are?<\/div>\n<figure id=\"attachment_17424\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-17424\" style=\"width: 600px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"17424\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics\/vital-statistics-3\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"600,350\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"vital-statistics\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1-300x175.jpg\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg\" tabindex=\"0\" role=\"button\" data-src=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg\" alt=\"Vital statistics\" title=\"Vital statistics\" width=\"600\" height=\"350\" class=\"size-full wp-image-17424 lazyload\" data-srcset=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1-300x175.jpg 300w\" data-sizes=\"(max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 600px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 600\/350;\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"17424\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics\/vital-statistics-3\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"600,350\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"vital-statistics\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1-300x175.jpg\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg\" tabindex=\"0\" role=\"button\" src=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg\" alt=\"Vital statistics\" title=\"Vital statistics\" width=\"600\" height=\"350\" class=\"size-full wp-image-17424\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/01\/vital-statistics-1-300x175.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/noscript><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-17424\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><strong>Name names, number numbers<\/strong> Draw attention to your message with numerical detail. <em>Image by Nadine Shaabana<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>Or one with this lead, from <em>Northern Update, <\/em>the marketing magazine of Northern Funds:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\">A 45-year-old couple making $80,000 a year today will need $4 million at retirement to live comfortably through their 80s.<\/div>\n<p>The latter? Me, too.<\/p>\n<p>Name names and number numbers. Draw attention to your message and prove your points with numerical detail.<\/p>\n<h3>1. How big is big?<\/h3>\n<p>Show readers size and scale with statistics and comparison.<\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s a before example, the lead of a content marketing piece a client sent me to edit:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\">The Rosa Khutor Alpine Resort is located in Krasnaya Polyana in the Northern Caucasus in Russia, close to the Black Sea. The resort is set to receive a major boost to its profile by becoming one of the major projects of the 2014 Winter Games.<\/p>\n<p>Some 43 hectares of sport tracks will reach nine kilometres in total in order to meet the requirements of the International Federation of Mountain Skiing (FIS). The resort has therefore been equipped with a state-of-the-art XYZ system. ABC&#8217;s value-added reseller, Whozits, was commissioned to implement the system. \u2026<\/p><\/div>\n<p>There&#8217;s a number in there, but it&#8217;s not used to build the story, set the scene or make a point. Here&#8217;s the after, this time with more statistical evidence to make a point about the client&#8217;s project:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\">You have to tilt your head to see the tops of the mountains at the Rosa Khutor Mountain Resort.<\/p>\n<p>In Russia&#8217;s Western Caucasus, some 30 km from the Black Sea, a massive mountain range soars up to 1,760 km \u2014 more than a mile \u2014 above a tiny subtropical village called Krasnaya Polyana. There, the world&#8217;s best athletes will assemble for the alpine skiing competition at the 2014 Winter Games.<\/p>\n<p>But that spectacular terrain also adds up to a major event security communication nightmare. \u2026<\/p><\/div>\n<h3>2. How small is small?<\/h3>\n<p>So how small is small? Is it the size of a thumbnail? An iPhone? A toaster? A backpack? A car?<\/p>\n<p>Help readers see size and scale with comparison.<\/p>\n<p>In this before, the client had included a laptop analogy, but buried it further in the story:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\"><strong>Delivering coverage fast has never been so easy<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Temporary communications coverage is often needed to get the job done \u2013 whether that\u2019s delivering security at a major event or completing a big engineering project on time. Whatever the need, the world\u2019s smallest base station makes rolling out coverage easier than ever.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The XYZ base station from ABC is the smallest base station in the world, yet it packs in the same powerful features as its big brother, the XX. These include fast TK data, air-interface encryption, 123 handover and base station fallback. \u2026<\/p><\/div>\n<p>But if the whole point is size, lead with that. Here\u2019s my rewrite:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\"><strong>Baby grand<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>The world\u2019s smallest base station makes rolling out coverage easier than ever<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s little larger than a laptop. But that\u2019s what makes ABC\u2019s XYZ mini base stations \u2014 the smallest base stations in the world \u2014 so powerful.<\/p>\n<p>You can use them to quickly roll out temporary communications coverage. They fit into tight spaces, save energy and money and even go mobile when necessary.<\/p>\n<p>Talk about small packages. \u2026<\/p><\/div>\n<h3> How wet is wet?<\/h3>\n<p>If your point is \u201cprone to flooding,\u201d then make that point statistically. Here&#8217;s another before, from that same client:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\">As a city prone to flooding, Tianjin in China uses a system of channels and flood retention areas around the city to manage flood water and limit the damage to urban areas. Tianjin is also known for its pioneering efforts in scientific and sustainable development. For the city, water conservation is a top priority and has the highest rate of water recycling in China.<\/p>\n<p>Digital communications plays a major role in this flood management plan and Tianjin has an 800 MHz XYZ network comprising one switch and 15 base stations covering both the city and its suburbs. In addition, one dispatcher workstation and around 100 terminals are used. \u2026<\/p><\/div>\n<p>OK, my basement is prone to flooding, too. But how wet is wet? Here&#8217;s my rewrite, supplemented with 6 minutes of online research:<\/p>\n<div class=\"excerptbox\" style=\"border:1px solid black;\">Tianjin ranks on a top 10 list no municipality wishes to make: It\u2019s among the top 10 cities in the world at risk of flood loss.<\/p>\n<p>Specifically, Tianjin risks losing nearly 100,000 residents and $30 billion in assets in a deluge, according to a report by Risk Management Solutions.<\/p>\n<p>As Tianjin leaders work to safeguard the sixth largest city in the People\u2019s Republic of China from potentially devastating floods, they employ a surprising tool. In addition to channels, reservoirs and hydraulic monitoring, city officials rely on an 800 MHz XYZ network, developed by ABC. \u2026<\/p><\/div>\n<h3>Add concrete detail with statistics.<\/h3>\n<p>Startling statistics are amongst more than <a href=\"https:\/\/revvingupreadership.com\/2018\/04\/details-make-the-difference-2\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">6 types of concrete material to try<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;If you want to be credible, be specific,&#8221; writes Doug Williams, a principal in Tomasini-W2K. &#8220;Heinz doesn\u2019t have a \u2018multitude\u2019 of varieties; it has 57. Bressler\u2019s doesn\u2019t have a \u2018whole lot\u2019 of flavors; it has 33. There aren\u2019t \u2018many\u2019 deadly sins; there are seven.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Well, eight, if you count vague writing.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>How can you make your message more colorful and credible with statistics?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>What questions do you have about using statistics in your message?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/writing-tips\/readability\/how-to-write-about-statistics\/\">Learn more about writing with statistics<\/a>.<\/p>\n<div id='MC-CD' class='widgets_on_page wop_tiny1  wop_small1  wop_medium1  wop_large1  wop_wide1'>\n\t\t\t<ul><li id=\"custom_html-39\" class=\"widget_text widget widget_custom_html\"><div class=\"textwidget custom-html-widget\"><a title=\"Master the Art of Storytelling - Ann Wylie's creative-content workshop\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/corporate-communications-training\/writing-classes\/business-storytelling-training\/\" target=\"\" rel=\"noopener\"><img decoding=\"async\" data-src=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/storytelling-workshop.png\" alt=\"Master the Art of Storytelling - Ann Wylie's creative-content workshop\" title=\"Master the Art of Storytelling - Ann Wylie's creative-content workshop\" width=\"auto\" height=\"auto\" border=\"0\" style=\"--smush-placeholder-width: 250px; --smush-placeholder-aspect-ratio: 250\/250;float:left; text-align:left; margin: 0 auto; margin-right: 10px; margin-top: 5px; margin-bottom: 5px; background-color: #ffffff; font-size: 18x; line-height: 22px; padding: 0px; color: #FFFFFF; max-width:100%; max-height:100%;\" class=\"img-max lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==\"><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/storytelling-workshop.png\" alt=\"Master the Art of Storytelling - Ann Wylie's creative-content workshop\" title=\"Master the Art of Storytelling - Ann Wylie's creative-content workshop\" width=\"auto\" height=\"auto\" border=\"0\" style=\"float:left; text-align:left; margin: 0 auto; margin-right: 10px; margin-top: 5px; margin-bottom: 5px; background-color: #ffffff; font-size: 18x; line-height: 22px; padding: 0px; color: #FFFFFF; max-width:100%; max-height:100%;\" class=\"img-max\"><\/noscript><\/a><h3>How can you make tedious topics interesting?<\/h3>\r\n<p>Fun facts and juicy details might seem like the Cheez Doodles and Cronuts of communication: tempting, for sure, but a little childish and not particularly good for you.<\/p>\r\n\r\n<p>Not so. Concrete details are more like salad dressing and aioli \u2014 the secret sauces it takes to get the nutritious stuff down.<\/p>\r\n\t\r\n<p>Now you can learn to use concrete details to change people's minds \u2014 and behavior \u2014 at <a title=\"Master the Art of Storytelling - Ann Wylie's creative-content workshop\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/corporate-communications-training\/writing-classes\/business-storytelling-training\/\" target=\"\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>Master the Art of Storytelling<\/strong><\/a>, our creative-writing workshop.<\/p>\r\n\r\n<p>There, you\u2019ll learn six quick ways to add color to your message and how to help readers understand big ideas through specific details.<\/p>\r\n\t\r\n<div class=\"btn btn--depth\" style=\"text-align: center;  margin: 10px 0 20px; width:100%;\"><a id=\"btnTT\" style=\"\" title=\"BOOK NOW\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/corporate-communications-training\/writing-classes\/business-storytelling-training\/\" target=\"\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" data-width=\"91\">BOOK NOW<\/a>\r\n<!-- [if mso]>\r\n<p style=\"line-height:0;margin:0;\"><v:roundrect xmlns:v=\"urn:schemas-microsoft-com:vml\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wyliecomm.com\/corporate-communications-training\/writing-classes\/business-storytelling-training\/\" style=\"width:153px\" arcsize=\"8%\" strokecolor=\"#D96237\" filled=\"t\"><v:fill type=\"gradient\" angle=\"180\" color=\"#f16522\" color2=\"#f16522\"><\/v:fill><v:textbox style=\"mso-fit-shape-to-text:t\" inset=\"0px,11px,0px,11px\"><center style=\"font-size:16px;line-height:24px;color:#FFFFFF;font-family:sans-serif;font-weight:bold;mso-line-height-rule:exactly;mso-text-raise:4px\">BOOK NOW<\/center><\/v:textbox><\/v:roundrect><\/p>\r\n<![endif]--><\/div>\r\n<\/div><\/li><\/ul><\/div><!-- widgets_on_page -->\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Numbers bring concreteness and color to your copy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":17424,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[251],"tags":[95,204,315,37],"class_list":{"0":"post-14951","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-concrete-details","8":"tag-description","9":"tag-details","10":"tag-numbers","11":"tag-statistics","12":"entry"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v23.4 (Yoast SEO v23.6) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Vital statistics - Wylie Communications, Inc.<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Vital statistics: Numbers bring concreteness and color to your copy. 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